Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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