Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
my shit smells like andre
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
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