She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Randomize