I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
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