the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
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