I bet he comes in French.
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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