If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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