his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
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