Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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