even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
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