I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
the day after is always just damage control
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
Randomize