Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
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Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
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I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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