His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Randomize