well I can't set my house on fire every night
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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