as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
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My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
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I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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