im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
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