I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
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