STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize