it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
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