Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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