yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
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