I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
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After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
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