like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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