Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
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