I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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