Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
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