i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
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he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
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