Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
i out mim tonsoeep
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