Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
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