actually, I'm a sock model
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize