I can't disclose who, but one time I called someone, they didn't pick up, and immediately texted back 'will call later, masturbating'
I thought that was really considerate
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
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