thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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