Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
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Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
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