3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
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She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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