BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
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