Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Randomize