Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
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