I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
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