my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
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Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Are we still banned from the library?
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
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It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
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