Just made out with a pet sitter. His biz card says "even hamsters". Lowest point in my life.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
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