Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize