Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
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