Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Randomize