Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
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