Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
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