so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize