Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
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