I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
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