just come out here and I will go home with you...
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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