a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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